Golden Lines

Golden Lines

As we said goodbye to 2024, it was interesting to recall that 25 years ago almost to the day, the world was turning the page towards the new millennium and people were holding their breath to see if critical IT systems were going to crash. It was a big deal at the time - to ensure that computers would be able to process the dates once it turned to 00, governments and businesses exerted significant efforts to update and test their systems before the impending expiry date.
My then-husband worked on the transition for Ottawa’s largest hospital and while I recall that by December 31st, there was a recognition that the sky would not fall, there was still uncertainty in the air. I was 8 months pregnant, with my son Alex, at the time and I recall feeling somewhat anxious about it as we approached midnight.

 

Fast forward to 2025 and one could now argue how simpler times were back in 2000!  One major issue that could significantly affect the world and concerted efforts were exerted to prevent it. It is easy to fall into despair or heightened anxiety nowadays when you make a list of all that could go wrong in 2025 - broadening wars, the climate crisis, rising class inequalities and hate, the unknown impact of artificial intelligence, the circus coming into Washington for the next four years and our own political dramas north of the border to name a few.  You don’t need to conduct scientific surveys to know that people are worried and are starting 2025 with some level of apprehension.

 

Unlike 2025, there is no single concerted effort that will avoid any form of disaster and I do not think that we should pretend that there is one. It is easy right now to be paralysed, lose hope in humanity or alternatively, hope for a magic solution that will make our problems go away.  It is a very human thing to do - and we have all done it, for small or big things in our lives.

 

A lot of the issues have been developing for decades without proper attention - humans are by nature very short sighted - or are so big that we feel helpless in addressing them.  Isn’t this a joyous subject for the first blog of the year 😉. Despite all of this, the point I want to make is that not all is lost.   

 

In my view, the worst thing we can do is underestimate the positive impact that we can have around us.  

We have to let go of assessing the magnitude of the impact our actions will have;  whether it will change anything at a systemic level to determining whether to act, and just do it. The main thrust in my view should be to forge greater connections and consciously improve the human experience of someone this year.
We do not have to go very far to see misery and need - our city streets have radically changed since the pandemic in terms of exposing misery, addictions and homelessness. Feelings of loneliness and isolation are on the rise, along with their dire consequences.

As things worsens, whether it is a perception or reality, the need for community and a sense of belonging grows - and there are so many ways to connect - you just have to figure out what more  you can do. And in my view, the key word is more, the status quo is not an option.

You may ask what I am doing besides preaching action these days. 2024 was a reset year for me. I left my senior management job due to a toxic environment and frankly, being burned out. I decided to give myself the time to heal and do what makes me happy - art, helping others, reflect, sleep and relax (I needed it!), get back into shape and the list goes on.

While the year overall was wonderful, I found December difficult. The one-year anniversary of my father’s death at the end of November hit me like a ton of bricks, which took me off guard. This was coupled with the need to end or re-shape relationships in light of how I have grown these past years. I became fully aware of the toll my life had taken on my body and soul to the extent that, when I would close my eyes and imagine myself, I would see my body full of scars. My skin was whole, but with a sensitivity that I have come to realise will be
there in some shape of form from now on. And then it also hit me that while the need to stop, rest and reflect was the best gift I could ever give myself, I have become very comfortable hiding in my little world and I am not pulling the weight I know I can.

In the past, it was all about the duty to serve, make a difference and please others. Now, it has become the need to love myself and others and to let go of the focus of the outcomes of whatever I am doing. I readily admit that it is still theoretical in some ways, as I am not going to pretend that I am there quite yet. But I am working on it.

At the beginning of my leave, I would tell friends “I do not know where I am going and I am ok with that” which in itself, was a true departure of my prior self, the typical, ambitious type- A personality. Nowadays, my discourse is “I have a broad sense of where I want to go, but I don’t know exactly how I will get there and that is ok”. This is very surreal to say this, and the 10-year-ago version of myself would probably have a heart attack hearing this… or secretly admitting “it’s about damn time”.

The other truth that has come to fore is that it is our vulnerabilities that brings us together and allows us to forge bonds that can withstand strong winds. As such, the image of my scars from early December has transformed in my mind into a map of my journey and of the knowledge and strengths that I can use to help others.

Kintsugi
In Japan, Kintsugi is the traditional repair method where broken pottery pieces are put back together with a lacquer and the joints are painted with gold or silver powder. Once repaired, the enhanced pottery continues to be used. As a philosophy, Kintsugi treats breakage and repair as part of the history of an object, rather than something to disguise.

I love this approach of taking care of our objects and turning their breaks into beautiful, artful opportunities to make them better. If you look at one of the available videos on this method,  it is striking to observe the patience and minutia of the artists mending the pottery. It is also a beautiful way to see how we can mend our breaks into something beautiful.  (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQW8t6w0C).
We all have been broken in some ways and healed our wounds to the best of our abilities. Our golden lines are the life highways and roads that connect us to others and allow us to see the humanity in others.  

Wishing you a humanly-connected 2025, filled with self-love, happiness and health. 

 

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